I Will Never Submit to Miss Grim Reaper - Chapter 106

Chapter 106: Shenzhen’s Cute Maid is a Super Cute Kitten!

 

This is probably my closest experience to “losing control.”

 

Catnip, scientifically known as Nepeta cataria, is a plant that has certain medical effects, such as preventing heatstroke, combating bad breath, assisting in treating gastrointestinal problems, and preventing colds. The tender stems and leaves can be used directly in folk cuisine to make cold dishes or to eliminate fishy odors.

 

Its roots contain very strong components that can stimulate the nervous system. Both the flowers and the leaves and stems can excite felines, giving them a temporary state of losing control and being cute, like a “Buff” in a game. Yes, catnip is effective for all members of the feline family, including large cats like lions, tigers, and leopards. However, the effects on these larger cats are not as long-lasting as they are for domestic kittens.

 

If, for instance, an ordinary cat experiences a cute “Buff” for 5 to 10 minutes after sniffing catnip, the duration for big cats like tigers and lions is only about one minute, followed by a “cooling-off period” that lasts for several hours. I once had a similar question when I was a child—Little Ming applied the “cuteness technique” to a tiger using catnip, lasting for 1 minute.

After that, Little Ming fled at a speed of 30 kilometers per hour, while the tiger, upon waking up, chased Little Ming at a speed of 60 kilometers per hour. The question was, how much longer could Little Ming survive?

 

The current situation for me is almost the same.

 

In the cat café, the effects of catnip on the little cats, especially Catmint, last for about ten minutes. After that, there’s a “wise man’s time” that extends from one to three hours. As a human, due to the morbid tastes of the Miss Grim Reaper, the so-called “catgirl” gene has been added to my body. The control effect of catnip on me is approximately three to five minutes. During this period, I feel lazy and silly, my brain is in a haze, and all I want is to get close to the source of the catnip scent. I then roll on the ground and act cute. Regardless of how tired I was before, at this moment, my entire body relaxes completely, followed by a plethora of pleasure spreading everywhere.

 

In the cat cafe managed by Ouyang Xue, there are currently three types of catnip for sale. The first one is the relatively common catnip hay, packaged in bags that resemble tea bags. Typically, these bagged catnips are for customers who are new to cat cafes, hoping to “try teasing the little cats” and play for about ten minutes before leaving. Just sprinkle the catnip on the floor, and soon many cats will come over for you to pet, commonly referred to as “fast food” in the café.

 

The second type is the “catnip lollipop” that Yin Xiamo used to tease me last night. This item is a concentrated version of catnip leaves, and because it is solid, it can be licked by the little cats for a long time. Therefore, it is known as “set meal one” in the café.

 

The third type is the “Catnip Spray” that Yin Xiamo currently has on her body, or you can call it “Combo Two.” This thing is not for cats but for humans. You spray it on yourself to become the “cat boss” — in a world so vast, not everyone is naturally inclined towards cats. Some people have disliked cats since childhood, running away whenever a cat approaches. In such cases, this spray comes in handy. Spraying a circle on yourself, standing in a forest, and even tigers would be drawn to you.

 

Moreover, because this thing is a true “concentrated liquid,” it contains almost all the effective ingredients of catnip. One bottle of spray is equivalent to the area of several square catnip leaves. After spraying about half the bottle on yourself, I sniffed it, and by the time I realized something was wrong, it was too late.

 

It’s like… my body is no longer under my control, and my brain keeps sending commands, urging me to approach and stick to this girl in front of me who exudes an enticing aroma from head to toe. If it weren’t for a trace of sanity still remaining in me, I suspect I might have rolled on the ground like that…

 

“Look, this is my wife.”

 

Facing the camera, Yin Xiamo shows no signs of timidity. She smoothly pulls me, who is still dizzy, into her embrace: “Sorry for the embarrassment. Nuo’er acts like this when she sees me. She’s very well-behaved at home, cooking for me every day, warming the bed, folding blankets. Isn’t that right, Nuo’er?”

 

After saying that, Yin Xiamo reached out and pinched my face. Due to the catnip aroma, I, in a daze, subconsciously made a sound like “Hmm, meow” from my nostrils.

 

“So, you guys are a couple, another big piece of news.”

 

The young male anchor in front revealed a delighted expression, “Are you both maids in this cafe?”

 

“Yes, today is my day off, so I’m not wearing the maid outfit. I just came to see Nuo’er.”

 

“Hmm, meow.”

 

Hold back, hold back… Don’t say too much, this is live…

 

“Have you two moved in together?”

 

“Yes, we usually sleep on the same bed. Nuo’er is my pillow.”

 

“Hmm, meow…”

 

Let her show off for a while… Ah, this scent is so comfortable…

 

“Is it true? Have you reached this stage? Do you guys usually watch Tongmeng Net?”

 

“Yes, we have a shared account called ‘Little Xia Nuo Does Not Hide in the Cardboard Box’ because at home, Nuo’er is like a little kitten. Occasionally, she hides in a cardboard box, making it hard for people to find her, hence the name.”

 

“Nuo’er, meow…”

 

Yin Xiamo seems to… look so appetizing…

 

“Hehe, it’s evident that your relationship is good. Were you from the same school before?”

 

“No, I’m from the Demon Tribe, and she used to be a brave warrior. As you can see, she’s now under my hypnosis, which will probably be lifted in about a minute.”

 

“Ha… So, you two have that kind of setup. It feels like there’s a taste of virtual streamers. Have you both been VTuber before?”

 

“VTuber? What’s that?”

 

“Meow, what’s a VTuber?”

 

I really want to bite her.

 

“Ah… Since you don’t know, let’s forget about it. Let’s change the topic. When I came here earlier, I only saw this little sister Nuo’er. I thought the cafe only had one maid…”

 

“…”

 

After three minutes, I slowly woke up, nestled in Yin Xiamo’s arms.

 

Wait a minute.

 

I groggily glanced at the girl behind me and then at the camera in front of me. All the events that had happened quickly flashed through my mind.

 

Oh my goodness…

 

Embarrassed, embarrassed, embarrassed!

 

I hastily pushed Yin Xiamo away from me.

 

“Here, this is Nuo’er after the hypnosis is lifted.”

 

The girl had an expression of ‘I told you so’.

 

“She’s usually a tsundere. Only after the hypnosis is cast does she become completely obedient to me.”

 

“Who would fall for your hypnosis!”

 

Gradually waking up from the effects of the “catnip,” I tiptoed and gave a solid thump to Yin Xiamo’s head.

 

Thud! Lower by ten centimeters!

 

Spraying catnip, catnip, I’ll spray you to death!

 

You cunning trickster, in a past life in another world, you must have seen cat girls acting all high and mighty because of this herb and then decided to inject this inexplicable thing into my body! I can understand things like elves, succubi, humans, and princesses. I might think they were just children fooling around, mixing and matching for fun. But this cat girl gene is definitely intentional!

 

“I have to go to work.”

 

Seeing that Yin Xiamo seemed capable of handling the situation with the anchor, I tidied up my somewhat messy hair, took a deep breath, shifted my mood, and said to the streamer, “If you need anything later, just scan the code on the table to order, okay?”

 

“Sure.”

 

The young anchor waved at me while gesturing to Yin Xiamo, “Is your h-husband really from the demon tribe?”

 

“Yes, yes, she’s a very naughty demon.”

 

I gave Yin Xiamo a playful look and addressed the camera, “So, everyone, take care of your health, eat on time, rest on time, don’t give this kind of trouble any chance. If you’re unsure what to have for dinner, you can come to the café, we have a chef preparing fast food, various steamed and fried dishes, and after your meal, we offer milk tea, cakes, and coffee…”

 

I guess I’ve learned the essence of Ouyang Xue’s “advertising,” right? With this spiel, I can cover up the awkwardness of having just sniffed catnip, making the anchor’s audience think we’re just playing a role, while also subtly promoting the cafe without being too conspicuous.

 

Although… if you really think about it, what we just said was quite nonsensical. Why are a demon and a brave warrior entangled? Why would a demon hypnotize a brave warrior? And why do they both end up as maids?

 

To put it bluntly… it was a bit cringe-worthy.

 

The problem is, neither Yin Xiamo nor I were acting. I just happened to need this kind of “a bit cringe, a bit chuuni” performance to cover up the earlier “catnip poisoning.” Otherwise, if news spreads like “Head Maid in a Certain Café Reacts to Catnip, Catgirl Creatures Might Become Real,” I might end up being taken to a research lab for extensive study and dissection.

 

“In the future, I’ll leave anything related to cats to you, my wicked demon lord.”

 

With this line said in front of the camera, I turned and walked out of the cat living area. Shouldn’t these materials be enough for him to promote and attract followers?

 

I took out my phone, opened Tongmeng Net, switched to the live streaming interface, found outdoor broadcasters—no need to scroll, the most-watched room in this category at the moment is “Visiting a Newly Opened Loli Maid Café.”

 

Extreme exploration king Liu Ziyi, is that the guy? This anchor has 430,000 followers, and there are currently 130,000 people watching the live stream. Impressive.

 

I casually clicked the follow button, put away my phone, and went upstairs.

 

Reacting to catnip myself, I realized I might need to reduce serving customers who want to “pet the cat” in the future. I’ll leave that job to Yin Xiamo so that if customers want to buy catnip or something, I’ll go to the warehouse to get it—avoiding any wrong turns that might lead me down a strange path.

 

Yin Xiamo doesn’t cook, so I handle the kitchen duties. Since I can’t come into contact with catnip, I usually have her bring snacks like catnip-flavored fish treats from the warehouse to entertain customers. She accompanies customers to pet the cats—a clear division of tasks.

 

For things like taking orders, serving dishes, or delivering ordered tea and coffee, whoever has the time can handle it. This is a shared responsibility among the maids.

 

Come to think of it, does Ai Luodi know how to cook?

 

As I walked towards the employee break area, the image of a certain food lover in the house came to mind. If she were to become a maid here… would she end up eating all the snacks in the cafe?

 

Similar to most white-collar offices, the cafe is stocked with various snacks. To cater to the employees, Ouyang Xue specifically bought a lot of snacks and drinks yesterday, placing them on the workstations on the first and second floors. There are snacks like Crispy Sharks, Snickers, White Chocolate, Dark Chocolate, Pea Garlic-flavored Green Beans, Spicy Strips, Konjac Shreds, and various teas and energy drinks.

 

In Ouyang Xue’s plan, the cafe should have at least one head maid and three maids, a total of at least four maids. Every month, these four maids would discuss who takes the morning, afternoon, or night shifts and handle any leave requests among themselves, with the manager taking over if needed.

 

These three shifts have their own characteristics. The morning shift requires waking up early but involves relatively light work. After all, the only busy period within the eight-hour shift is during lunchtime. The evening shift allows for a bit of a sleep-in but demands dealing with the super busy evening peak hours. The night shift, on the other hand, has almost no peak hours, and very few people come to the cafe to drink coffee and pet cats in the middle of the night. At most, there might be some night owls ordering takeout or passing customers wanting fried chicken. The workload is theoretically the lightest during this shift.

 

However, the evening shift is still a night shift and can be taxing on the body. I’ve worked evening shifts in small factories and restaurants before, and while the work itself isn’t tiring, adjusting to the different sleep schedule can be challenging. After finishing an evening shift, daytime rest never feels as comfortable as sleeping at night. Apart from various outside noise pollutions, the body itself is not adapted to sleep in the morning, always feeling like you never got enough sleep even after lying down for more than ten hours.

 

In any case, with the current staffing situation and the cafe not opening at night, handling shifts with just me, Yin Xiamo, and Ai Luodi shouldn’t be too difficult. The concern arises if the cafe gains popularity, the commercial street is truly developed, and there’s a surge in foot traffic. A few maids might not be enough to handle the increased demand.

 

“Sister Ouyang.”

 

There were three light taps on the door of the employee break room on the second floor, and I pressed down the handle.

 

“How is it going?”

 

Ouyang Xue, lying on the small bed, seemed to be better. “What did that streamer say?”

 

“Yin Xiamo is chatting with him downstairs.”

 

I reached out and touched Ouyang Xue’s forehead.

 

It’s still quite warm, but compared to before, it’s slightly better.

 

“That streamer probably went back and posted the photo of us together in the water friend group, and it got questioned for being photoshopped.”

 

I sat down at the bedside. “Maybe what he said that day about coming back to help with promotion was just a formality. He might have had to come over after being questioned by the group.”

 

“That’s how the adult world works. Even if it’s just a formality, we have to… cough, treat it as genuine.”

 

Seeing Ouyang Xue about to sit up, I quickly pressed her down. “Sister Ouyang, get some rest. I can handle it…”

 

He’s just a streamer with four hundred thousand followers. Once the cafe gets going, we can handle such situations.

 

“Sorry, it’s a professional habit…”

 

My strong attitude first surprised Ouyang Xue, but then she seemed to recall something. “When I was a VTuber before, any small mistake would be magnified by the audience. The management also required us to take every invitation from other streamers seriously, treating even the most polite words as genuine. Otherwise, we might be accused of being arrogant…”

 

“Don’t worry, that outdoor streamer just came back to take a look, allowing his audience to confirm he wasn’t lying. He didn’t organize any event.”

 

I said with a serious tone, “As a person, he’s okay.”

 

By normal standards, at least.

 

In today’s society, where entertainment reigns supreme, anyone can become a streamer. After becoming a streamer, some unexpectedly become popular due to some live broadcast content or short video hitting the right chord with the majority of the modern audience. They become famous and then fade away.

 

Some people start streaming out of curiosity, never expecting to become popular. Others are in their teens or early twenties, lacking worldly experience. After becoming famous, they suddenly receive countless praises, and their vanity naturally swells.

 

I vaguely remember working at a restaurant before. A streamer with over ten thousand followers finished their meal and said, “I’m from a certain platform, and I have many fans. I’ve helped promote your restaurant, consider it free advertising. Is it too much to ask for a free meal?”

 

I told them that, as a waiter, I couldn’t make such decisions and needed to consult with the boss. When the boss came over, they looked at the streamer, didn’t recognize them, and said, “What streamer? I don’t know them. Besides, we didn’t ask you to advertise. Why? Are you expecting a free meal?”

 

The result was that the streamer caused a scene in the restaurant, filmed a video, edited it selectively, and posted it online, claiming that the restaurant’s owner went back on their word. They alleged that the promised advertising in exchange for a free meal ended up requiring payment. This led to numerous curious customers ordering from that restaurant for delivery and leaving negative reviews. Eventually, the restaurant’s delivery service was taken down, and the owner was left in a difficult situation.

 

“We’ll just ignore him for now. Later at… five o’clock, a delivery truck will bring over pre-marinated chicken from the headquarters, along with 100 pounds of vegetables and two crates of cola…”

 

Ouyang Xue looked at me with an expression that seemed to say, ‘Sorry to trouble you’.

 

“If you can’t handle it, you can ask Chef Wang for help. The staff is a bit short today, and I… cough, have a cold. I can only rely on you.”

 

“Okay.”

 

I took out a notepad and pen that I carried with me and quickly wrote down these instructions, “Anything else?”

 

“At seven-thirty, there will be a box of cat food delivered, Green Blessing Cat Food, with labels. Although we’re quite familiar with that store, when you receive the goods… also check the anti-counterfeit label.”

 

“Got it.”

 

“At eight o’clock, the cleaning auntie will come. By then, there shouldn’t be many people. Assist her in cleaning the automatic cat litter…”

 

“I know about that.”

 

“Also, your sister, is she really your sister or just a friend? If she has any questions, help her out.”

 

“Don’t worry, we have a good relationship.”

 

Having noted all the points Ouyang Xue brought up, I poured a cup of hot water into the bowl on the bedside table. “You can rest assured, Sister Ouyang. Leave the rest to me.”

 

“You’re working hard.”

 

“No problem. Compared to me, Sister Ouyang is the one facing real challenges.” I stood up. “Call me if you need anything.”

 

If I remember correctly, Ouyang Xue should have been staying directly at the café these days.

 

Setting aside everything else about this café, the living facilities are quite complete. There are bedrooms and beds for the staff to rest, and across from the employee lounge on the second floor, there’s a bathroom and toilet for showering. The ground floor is all about food, and the scenery is especially good. As long as you want, staying here for a few months is not a problem.

 

Every day, she handles various tasks like receiving guests, managing inventory, cleaning, and maintaining the café’s ordering system. It’s quite strange that Ouyang Xue isn’t exhausted or sick from all these activities.

 

“Ding dong! Table 19, the customer is calling for a waiter!”

 

As I stepped out of the staff lounge, my headphones alerted me that a customer needed assistance with making a purchase. I opened the café app on my phone, clicked the “Maid Received” button, and gracefully descended the stairs in round-toe maid shoes to locate table 19.

 

Not surprisingly, it was the outdoor streamer.

 

“Is the interview over?”

 

I approached with a smile, took out a pen and paper, and with a “ding,” opened the self-ordering system on the table. “Sir, may I take your order?”

 

“Haven’t seen you for a few days, and your place has become so smart?”

 

The streamer first aimed the camera at me for a few seconds before turning it toward the self-ordering system on the table. “Do I just scan the code?”

 

“Yes, scanning the code allows you to place your order directly. If you’re not used to it, you can also verbally tell me your choices, and I’ll record them for you.”

 

I handed over the menu.

 

“Then I definitely want one-on-one service with the maid, although scanning the code is smart, it lacks a personal touch.”

 

The young man picked up the menu. “Half a Medicinal Steamed Chicken, is there any small gift with that?”

 

“At the moment, our store is in the trial operation phase, and we don’t have any ongoing promotions. However, since the streamer just helped with publicity, we’ll include a complimentary chicken soup, special waxed meat rice, and dried fish for you.”

 

“Dried fish?”

 

“Dried fish is for feeding cats, it’s a cat treat.”

 

I quickly explained, “Didn’t many little cats greet you earlier? The cats here remember people. After feeding them this time, maybe the next time you come, they’ll automatically come over to play with you without needing treats…”

 

Lowering my voice intentionally, I added, “If any fans from the live stream want to come and eat, ordering the steamed chicken will also include chicken soup, waxed meat rice, and dried fish. This is a exclusive benefit, keep it low-key, just show your fan badge when placing the order.”

 

When the machine in the café steamed the “Medicinal Steamed Chicken,” the by-products were chicken soup. In other words, giving away chicken soup doesn’t cost us anything. The waxed meat rice is a sweet rice dish taught to me by Ouyang Xue last night. The main ingredients are glutinous rice, red kidney beans, longan, and red dates. The cost is minimal, just like the amount that fits in a funnel. You can steam it together with the chicken without wasting electricity. Compared to the over thirty yuan cost of half a chicken, the cost of a funnel of rice is negligible.

 

As for the dried fish… in the end, they will be fed to the cats in the café. Once they are full, the cats won’t go for the cat food in the automatic feeder, saving the cost of that portion of cat food. When rounded off, it means all these things come at no cost.

 

“Brothers, see this, Maid Nuo’er is giving us a benefit. Brothers who live nearby, why not hurry and come?”

 

Hearing me say this, the streamer was also very “cooperative” and immediately spoke into the microphone: “Bring your fan badge for benefits. Last time, getting a badge was equivalent to buying a permanent discount coupon here. You can also receive free gifts regularly. It’s a stable gain, not a loss. Even if you don’t watch me, for the sake of this adorable young lady, getting a fan badge isn’t too much, right?”

 

“Then give me a serving of Medicinal Steamed Chicken, and also this… this ‘Heat-Clearing and Fire-Reducing Tea.'”

 

“This one is bitter, really bitter, okay?”

 

“No problem, I can endure bitterness.”

 

“Ding dong! We have a customer!”

 

And so, with this Tongmeng web streamer, “Extreme Explorer King Liu Ziyi,” ordering the steamed chicken, my workday began. As mealtime approached, I, as a maid, started a busy day.

 

Guiding the customers who entered, directing them to their seats, and then helping them scan the QR code for ordering. Providing service to customers who wanted photos together. When the delivery truck arrived outside, I, along with Mr. Wang, carried various ingredients and goods inside. The cat living area was left to Yin Xiamo, who hadn’t yet put on the maid outfit…

 

From 5 to 8 in the evening, for three hours straight, I had almost no moments to rest. If I wasn’t delivering meals to customers, I was on the way to deliver. Even though the café had the air conditioning on, I still ended up sweating all over. Forget about underwear, even the white thigh-high stockings on my legs were soaked with sweat.

 

It continued until after 8. The cleaning auntie came in, and I assisted her in scooping cat litter, checking the automatic feeder and water dispenser in the cat living area, tightening the screws and fixing brackets on the cat climbing frame. I cleaned up the cat hairs scattered all over the place. Once I confirmed that the day’s work was successfully completed, I lay down directly on the massage chair, took off the maid’s round-toe shoes from my feet.

 

“Ah… this time every day is the most comfortable!”

 

“Humming” as I swayed my white stockings-clad feet on the massage chair, I looked out of the glass window at the night view of the sea. Under the bright moonlight, the “Shenzhen-class Cruiser” was parked lonely by the shore, with only a dim streetlight nearby casting a lonely glow on the surrounding sea.

 

“Nuo’er!”

 

I don’t know how long passed, Yin Xiamo ran down from the second floor of the café, holding two cups of bubble tea, “I think I’ve learned how to make this!”

 

“Just follow the ingredients list on the worktable, and you can make it…”

 

I turned my head, “What about the manager? Is she still sleeping?”

 

“Still sleeping.”

 

“Is she okay? You told me it’s just a common cold, don’t let me see a grim reaper pouncing again…”

 

“Don’t worry, she’s just exhausted, far from being taken away.”

 

Yinxiamo ran over and handed me one of the bubble teas, “Try the one I made!”

 

“You didn’t add anything strange in it, did you?”

 

I took the straw and sucked a sip from the cup.

 

Hmm… the taste is a bit strange, but it falls within the “drinkable” range.

 

“Did you add mango and lychee to the black tea?”

 

After finishing it, I looked up, “You did a good job, but don’t do it like this next time.”

 

Anyway, the bubble tea on the second-floor worktable is ready-made. Even if Yin Xiamo’s cooking skills are terrible, at most, she’ll just mix various mismatched ingredients together, and it won’t result in a dark dish.

 

“Huh? Can’t I add it like this? I think it should taste good…”

 

“Not exactly delicious, but not bad either.”

 

“Don’t you like it, Nuo’er?”

 

The girl beside me thought for a moment and promptly planted a kiss on my face, “Then let’s change it to a kiss!”

 

“You just want a reason to kiss me, don’t you?!”

 

“No way! Nuo’er worked so hard today and deserves this reward!”

 

Yin Xiamo took out her phone, “By the way, with the promotion we did today with the outdoor streamer, how many new followers did we gain?”

 

“We now have 104.”

 

I took out my phone and opened the Tongmeng Net app, “Here.”

 

“When will Nuo’er post a video on there?”

 

“Well, I’ll consider it when I have some free time in the next few days…”

 

“I heard about something called ‘big data’ in this world before.”

 

The girl sat down on the armrest of the massage chair and leaned in front of me, “For our newly registered account, how does big data recommend things? Can it detect things like demons and grim reapers?”

 

“How could it be so magical? That would be similar to mind-reading. Generally, big data for new accounts recommends things based on gender and age, suggesting content that is generally acceptable, and then gradually…”

 

I switched to the recommended page on Tongmeng Net: “For example, hmm?”

 

At this moment, on my phone screen, the first video was—

 

?Extreme Adventure King Liu Ziyi’s Latest Compilation: Shenzhen’s Cute Maid is a Super Cute Kitten! Meow-Meow Yin Nuo’er?

 

What on earth is this!

 

“Wow, it seems to be the live video we just did!”

 

While I was still stunned, Yin Xiamo next to me reached out and tapped on this recommended video—

 

“Nuo’er Meow!”

 

In the quiet café, the phone that had the ringtone turned up to the maximum to hear customer entry notifications played a lot of my afternoon interview when I was drowsy from sniffing catnip—

 

“VTuber, meow!”

 

“Yes, we usually sleep on the same bed. Nuo’er is my body pillow.”

 

“Meow!”

 

“Meow!”

 

“……”

 

“Ding dong! Welcome!”

 

The most problematic part was that, at this moment, the café’s door was pushed open, and Ai Luodi, in casual clothes, walked in from outside, “Are you both here? Where’s the manager? I’m here for an interview.”

 

“What was that sound just now? Why does it sound like Nuo’er is being cute?”

 

“……”

 

……