I Will Never Submit to Miss Grim Reaper - Chapter 27
“Cockroach Brother, I need to have a serious talk with you about this.”
Seemingly embarrassed that I heard the phrase “forget about the Uncle” during the speakerphone call, Pipi brought the phone to his ear and said earnestly, “What’s wrong with a small author? What’s wrong with a few thousand yuan in royalties? Isn’t a thousand yuan money? In our rights protection… if there are authors willing to join, it’s certainly about uniting all available forces, isn’t it a bit harsh to say what you just did?”
Cockroach Bullies and Poison Fang, both authors who primarily wrote fantasy, seemed to have moved on to writing urban conveyor belt fiction on other websites since the site had shut down.
In this era of mass entertainment, traditional online novels are no longer as popular. They have become fast-food literature, focusing on attractive book titles, such as “Starting Off by Being Dumped by the Strongest Fairy: I Awakened a Super God System” or “I’m Globally Wanted, Announcing Nuclear Fusion Technology on the Spot,” or some following the latest trends like “I Possessed a Pinxi System, Sixty Thousand People Can’t Kill Me,” and so on. The point is to create a captivating façade – the book title, synopsis, and cover must be attention-grabbing, and the beginning must be captivating. The rest can follow the usual conveyor belt pattern.
They typically start with ridicule, annihilation, or a destitute and near-death scenario to incite readers’ anger. Then the protagonist turns the tables, creating a sense of excitement, repeating this formula for millions of words.
The challenge in such novels lies in the beginning, the synopsis, and the first three chapters. If the beginning captures readers, the subsequent plot is easy to write. If the beginning doesn’t grab attention, it means the book lacks potential, and the author needs to try again under a different pen name.
At the same time, the process of authors writing has become more and more fast-food-like.
There are many examples like this. In short, after getting used to this kind of input method, two keystrokes for others produce two words, while for those used to this system, two keystrokes generate a whole paragraph. Everything from templates, formats, and storylines is readily available. This is why some authors can write five or even ten chapters in just one or two hours, producing thousands of words per hour. You type two keystrokes and get two words; others type two keystrokes and get a paragraph. They don’t need to think; everything from the reactions of the onlookers when the protagonist appears to how the protagonist fights, what bystanders exclaim, can all be generated by entering a few keywords and selecting from a template.
Based on these two writing styles and thought processes, authors can broadly be divided into two factions. One is the “Dreamer” faction, like “Marisa’s Iron Butt,” “Divine Pet Pipi,” “Jituto” who focus on storytelling and narrative style. The other is the “Realist” faction, like Cockroach Bullies and Poison Fang, who emphasize quantity and typing speed to make money.
Meanwhile, Cockroach Bullies had established an exclusive QQ group for top-tier authors affiliated with Yae-Do Light Novel. It was rumored that only authors who had reached the top 20 in site rankings were eligible to join. Well-known authors in the group recommended each other’s novels, discussed strategies, and shared money-making secrets.
Given this background, Cockroach Bullies, Poison Fang, and Pipi hadn’t really gotten along well. As for someone like me, an unknown author with little income, it was somewhat expected that this person chose to be “frank.”
“Divine Pet Pipi, I know you often play games with that Uncle, and you have a good relationship. You often speak up for those mid-to-low-level authors, and you have a good standing among them. But, my friend, let me give you some advice: reputation is the most useless thing. No matter how much you help those authors, they won’t subscribe to your book. It’s clear that this website can’t be saved, and everyone is going their own way. It’s best to retrieve your royalties. If you can’t, well, I’ll just treat it as a trip to Shenzhen to pick up girls.”
In front of our group, Pipi’s phone conveyed a somewhat impatient voice from Cockroach Bullies. “I really appreciate that you’re standing up for the brothers this time, but honestly… sometimes, I feel like your brain isn’t working properly. Since you have the contact information for the chief editor, why don’t you just talk to us top-level authors directly? The fewer people who know about this, the better our chances of getting our royalties back, don’t you agree?”
“You’ve called so many people, even the authors with royalties of only a thousand bucks. When that big shot goes back and spreads the word, and all those authors in the author group… how many authors make a monthly income of one or two thousand? A conservative estimate, over a thousand, right? If all these authors come together to demand their royalties, and the boss sees not just ten or twenty people but hundreds all at once, they’ll just run. Then we won’t get a single cent.”
“But…”
Pipi wanted to say something, but the voice on the other end of the line cut him off, “Alright, it’s not convenient to talk on the phone. Give me your address, I’ll talk to you in more detail when I get there.”
*Click, click, click…*
The call ended, and Pipi looked at his phone screen with a hint of a headache. He cast me an apologetic look and said, “Nuo’er, don’t take it to heart. That’s just the way Cockroach Bullies is…”
“I know,” I smiled. “I don’t mind.”
In fact, I’ve become accustomed to these situations. Being broke is like that. In an author group, the influential authors have the most say, just like in the real world, where rich people often have others echoing their words.
I’ve lost count of how many times I’ve been ignored, at the office or near my apartment. If things get too much, I watch an episode of an anime to relax, or I scream into the bathroom faucet while rinsing my head. It makes me feel better.
Then I turn the frustration of being ridiculed into motivation to move forward!
‘Never underestimate a poor man!’ No, no… now it’s ‘Never underestimate a poor girl.’
You shouldn’t punish yourself for others’ mistakes and make yourself unhappy for days, right?
“I’ve sent him the address,” he said.
Pipi tapped on his phone and sighed, “I shouldn’t have invited Cockroach Bullies in the first place.”
“Indeed,” I agreed.
Jiang Wei, sitting in front of me, appeared a bit disgruntled. “I couldn’t stand their arrogant attitude when I refused to join their exclusive author group.”
“I’ve left that group too,” Pipi added.
Su Yunjin, known as “Jituto” chimed in, “I felt it didn’t match my writing style.”
“Jituto, you’re from a wealthy family. You’re different,” Pipi laughed. “We write to make a living, but you write for fun.”
Wealthy second-generation?
As I heard this term, I became a bit curious. Is Su Yunjin also from a wealthy background?
“Why are you sitting on the grass like this? Isn’t it dirty?” Just then, a somewhat frivolous voice came from nearby. Two people in shirts and jeans, led by a middle-aged woman who looked like a tour guide, walked over from the garden entrance. “Pipi? Who’s Pipi?”
Then, the man with earrings who had been speaking noticed me in the center of the lawn and said, “Wow! What a cute little girl! Are you all out with your families?”
Pipi stood up and said, “Cockroach Bullies?”
“Right, this is Cockroach Bullies, and this one is Poison Fang. The website owes us a total of 320,000 yuan in unpaid fees: 240,000 for me and 80,000 for him.”
Although he was addressing Pipi, “Cockroach Bullies” had his gaze fixed almost entirely on me. “This little sister is too cute, isn’t she? Her skin is so fair and smooth. Is she someone’s little sister here, or is she your daughter, Pipi?”
“Come on, my daughter is only a few years old and can hardly walk yet.”
Pipi’s mouth twitched, and he gestured to Jiang Wei on my left and Su Yunjin on my right, saying, “Let me introduce you, this is Marisa’s Iron Butt and Jituto.”
“Okay.”
Cockroach Bullies still wore that frivolous expression and seemed to respond as if it were a mere formality. He didn’t even glance at Jiang Wei and Su Yunjin, keeping his eyes fixed on my face. “So, did the Uncle Who Loves Loli not come today? Honestly, I really don’t like that author name. A grown man using a name like that… Tsk, his thoughts must be quite impure. When others see the name ‘Loli,’ they probably just run away.”
Then, this man in his late twenties crouched down in front of me. “Little girl, do you have a school holiday today? Are you out to make friends? Do you have a boyfriend?”
“Um…”
I instinctively moved back a little as this guy continued, “Thank you, but I’m not thinking about dating right now.”
“Don’t be afraid. We’re all authors, we write novels. Do you know what novels are? Have you ever read a novel? Just go online and search for Yae-Do Light Novel Network,’ and then search for ‘Cockroach Bullies.’ The ninth-ranked book is the one I wrote, and I make a lot of money every month.”
Cockroach Bullies seemed quite interested in me and maintained a tone similar to coaxing a child. While he spoke, he edged closer to Pipi and said, “Is this child a celebrity or something? She’s too cute! I’ve never seen such an adorable little girl. Is she your friend? Tell me more about her.”
Pipi hesitated and looked unsure how to respond. “Well…”
He continued, “You mentioned earlier that there’s ‘Uncle’ guiding you. Where is he? Hasn’t he arrived?”
Cockroach Bullies glanced around the small lawn, then in a slightly sarcastic tone, he said, “So, where’s that author who writes under the quirky name and has only made a little over a thousand from writing 300,000 words in four years – ‘Uncle Loves Loli’?”
“Cough, cough, no need to call him out,” said Jiang Wei, who couldn’t bear it anymore. He stood up and walked over to Cockroach Bullies. He lightly tapped the guy’s shoulder with his fist and then pointed to me, who was looking innocent on the lawn.
“This is the one you’ve been emphasizing, the cute little girl who looks like a young star…”
“Yep, that’s ‘Uncle Loves Loli’.”