I Will Never Submit to Miss Grim Reaper - Chapter 87
The manager of the café, Ouyang Xue, seemed to treat me as a “young adult with no social experience going out for the first time.”
“Here, there should be a mirror at home, right? Someone like you, who looks relatively young, is more suitable for a childlike hairstyle. Can you see it? The purpose of a hairstyle is to accentuate strengths rather than compensate for weaknesses.”
She placed a small mirror on the table, allowing me to see the appearance of my long hair from behind. Ouyang Xue gestured with her hands to indicate the top of my head.
“Your hair is very long, and you have a lot of it. A regular double ponytail might give a sense of virtual idol-like unreality, like Hatsune Miku… My goodness, how many years have you been growing your hair? Haven’t you tried styling it before?”
“No.”
I casually fabricated a lie, “I didn’t think it would grow this long when I started working as a waiter. After getting dismissed, I started working from home, freelancing. I haven’t cut my hair since.”
“Oh, right, I remember now. The person who came to eat chicken yesterday did mention that she’s your editor.”
Ouyang Xue took a white satin ribbon and asked, “Did you used to write novels?”
“Yes.”
“What genre of novels?”
“Probably… well… novels that can make money.”
“Drama? Shounen? Yaoi? Yuri?”
I evaded, “I’ve written them all.”
For a novelist, being asked about the content of their books is the most awkward, especially when the titles or pen names sound particularly embarrassing.
For example, like my pen name, “Uncle Loves Loli,” or books that some authors write, such as “I, Who Turned into a Beautiful Girl, Was Pushed Down by My Sister.” Would you dare to mention these to relatives and friends? Certainly not. Uttering such book titles is essentially no different from cross-dressing in front of relatives.
What’s more important is that when relatives and friends around you ask about the title of your book, even if you confess, they probably won’t bother to read it. Just opening a browser and searching for the book title or pen name is already giving you face, let alone caring whether the website is pirated or legitimate.
As for clicking into the content… Pay for a subscription? Sorry, we’re not that close. I’ve asked Pipi Marisa and others similar questions when playing games, and I got almost identical responses: they dislike it when relatives and friends ask about the names of their novels. Because it’s essentially a futile effort; even if you tell them, they won’t read it. It’s better to change the topic when there’s a chance.
Moreover, due to differing values, others might assume your books are something like “The Horse Qi Continent,” “Blue Silver Grass Entanglement,” or “Rise of a Great Nation.” They might think your books either depict the struggles of grassroots officials in real society or involve intense dragon-slaying battles in a fantasy world. They feel it’s okay to ask, and if you don’t say anything, they might think you’re looking down on your fellow brothers or pretending.
“Well, it seems like you’re quite familiar with the hot topics online.”
Fortunately, Ouyang Xue didn’t press further on the topics of “your pen name” or “the name of your book” but changed the subject: “Since you’re familiar with entertainment culture and the world of anime and manga, you must have watched quite a few anime and movies, right?”
“I have.”
“Since your hair is too long, having double ponytails doesn’t give off that playful vibe. Let’s try a different approach.”
Walking behind me, Ouyang Xue grabbed a handful of hair, holding the ribbon: “Have you seen the anime ‘Celestial Method‘?”
I nodded, “Yes.”
‘Celestial Method,’ a somewhat niche and heartwarming yuri anime.
“Your hairstyle can take inspiration from Noel in that anime.”
While speaking, Ouyang Xue began to comb through my hair, “Because you look… really young, you can only go for a cute style.”
Noel’s hairstyle, right? I recall it’s like a younger version of Kudryavka.
“Remember this, okay? In the future, when you’re in front of the mirror, lift it up like this, twirl the ribbon around your hand a few times, and then with the hair… like this.”
Listening to Ouyang Xue’s voice behind me, I felt like a portion of my hair was being lifted, and then something tightly secured it in place.
“The same for the right side, align them on both sides.”
Shortly after, the right side of my head felt a similar tightness.
“As for the bangs in the front, you can let them hang down to both sides, but be careful not to let your hair fall into the food when delivering orders—do you usually shed a lot of hair?”
“Not much.”
I shook my head, “At least I haven’t shed much in the last two days.”
“Oh, well, it seems like your hair quality is still good. In the summer, cats shed a lot. In a while, there will be around thirty cats coming in. Get to know them, and learn how to use tools to groom them.”
I understand the logic, but why are you comparing my hair shedding with cat fur!
“Done.”
Finally, she used a small comb to carefully groom my hair on the top of my head. She pulled apart the two white ribbons on the left and right, making it look a bit fluffy. Ouyang Xue gestured that I could stand up.
“Thank you, Sister Ouyang!”
Looking at myself in the mirror, who seemed much younger, despite feeling a bit frustrated, I instinctively thanked Ouyang Xue.
Alright, originally, with my height of less than 1.4 meters and a young, fair face, I looked like I was under 12 years old. However, with the smooth shoulder-length hair, I appeared more mature, reluctantly pushing my apparent age to around 14. By styling my hair like this, I seemed to have regressed to a 10-year-old.
“After going back, spend some time learning how to style hair. If you can’t manage, and you’re not busy in the next few days, you can come find me to learn.”
Checking the time on her phone, Ouyang Xue patted my shoulder, “Have you had breakfast?”
I replied instinctively, “Yes.”
“I suggest eating a bit more in advance. It’s okay to eat until you’re full. Although there isn’t much foot traffic here, because you’re the only maid, it will get especially busy around noon.”
Ouyang Xue had an expression on her face as if she had just seen a silly Loli, “Especially from eleven to two, if it’s crowded, you basically won’t have time for lunch, you know?”
Huh?
I knew that restaurant servers usually didn’t have time for lunch around noon, but… it didn’t have to be this exaggerated, right?
“Come over here. The chef just arrived, and you can also learn about the desserts and main dishes we’re currently making. If the chef takes a day off or something, you can take over his work.”
Ouyang Xue waved at me, ignoring my reaction, and walked straight to the kitchen on the first floor.
Taking over the chef’s work?!
Upon hearing this, I was dumbfounded.
Are you hiring a maid or a versatile young lady?
Although filled with confusion, I still followed Ouyang Xue.
“I’m grooming you to be the future manager.”
Seemingly hearing my thoughts, Ouyang Xue explained ahead, “Since there aren’t many customers right now, it’s good for you to learn more. I’m not that kind of heartless capitalist. This café was temporarily entrusted to me. The sooner you reach the level of managing the entire store, the sooner I can step down, go back to being a logistics manager, and enjoy a relaxing day playing with my phone.”
Grooming me… to be the future manager?
“Hi, Uncle Wang.”
In my confusion, I had already entered the kitchen with Ouyang Xue, where a sign hung that read “Unauthorized Personnel Not Allowed” along with a small bunny sticker.
Suddenly, a noticeable warmth and the enticing aroma of roasted chicken hit me.
“Currently, the stir-frying section hasn’t started yet. We only make some fast food, like fried chicken, Orleans roasted chicken, and the oven-baked chicken I taught you last night, called the Beggar’s Chicken.”
As she spoke, Ouyang Xue turned around and gestured towards a middle-aged man wearing a chef’s uniform and a chef’s hat, with a mask on. “This is Uncle Wang, the top chef we hired at a high cost from another restaurant.”
Is it really okay to say this in front of him?
“Good morning, Sister Ouyang!”
Surprisingly, this “Chef Wang” seemed accustomed to Ouyang Xue’s informal behavior and waved in our direction. “And this…”
“Nuo’er, you can just call her Nuo’er or Sister Nuo’er. She’s a recommended candidate from the headquarters who came in through the back door. I’m quite satisfied with her, though she’s a bit silly and needs some training.”
When did I become silly?
“Haha, Sister Ouyang, you’re still the same, always fond of jokes.”
Chef Wang had particularly small eyes, almost squinting to a narrow slit when he spoke, giving off a vibe similar to “Brock” from the Pokémon animated series—simple and endearing.
“Are you sure she’s of legal age? She looks like she hasn’t even started high school, she’s so petite.”
Staring at me for a few seconds, the “Chef Wang” in front of me curiously asked, “Sister Ouyang, is the headquarters sending… CEO’s daughter to experience the real world or something?”
“Don’t talk nonsense. I checked her ID, she turned 18 last December.”
Ouyang Xue sat down on the large metal table in the middle of the kitchen, “I’ll give you two tasks: teach her how to make our signature fried chicken, Orleans roasted chicken, and Portuguese egg tarts, as well as the new Meow Meow Cat Paw Egg Tarts.”
Chef Wang looked dumbfounded, “What egg tarts?”
“Meow Meow Cat Paw Egg Tarts, a new food that’s trending now.”
Ouyang Xue took a small box from her bag, opened it, and pointed to what seemed like chocolate-made cat paw-shaped desserts inside, “Make them like regular egg tarts, and add this in the middle.”
Chef Wang briefly inspected those chocolate treats, then looked at me on the side, “This little sister seems quite suitable for making these.”
“Let’s start with fried chicken and egg tarts. I haven’t eaten anything yet.”
Like a big sister, Ouyang Xue lifted her long legs clad in black stockings, “Cut a chicken in half, one half for the signature fried chicken and the other for Orleans. And make ten egg tarts, now.”
“Alright!”
Chef Wang gestured for me to come over, “Have you made fried chicken before?”
I spoke the truth, “I have, but I don’t know the recipe.”
Fried chicken, just like the “Beggar’s Chicken” Ouyang Xue taught me earlier, seemed to be quite similar.
Times have changed. In the past, running a street-side barbecue or fried chicken stall might have required learning many things, such as controlling the cooking time, managing ingredients, and more. However, nowadays, almost all the fried chicken recipes in various branded stores are kept secret. In the morning, ingredients are purchased, a large quantity of them is brought in, marinated with special sauces, and when it’s time to fry, they’re coated with a mixture of breadcrumbs and flour, then placed in a machine with preheated oil. The machine automatically times and flips the chicken, and when it’s done, it gives a “ding” sound as a prompt. Taking out the fried chicken is considered complete.
The entire process has little technical difficulty, even children can do it. Chain stores are even simpler, requiring no training. The headquarters sends someone every day to distribute seasoning packs. When a customer places an order, roll the chicken in the seasoning pack, put it in the machine, and when the time is up, it’s ready to serve.
As for making this at home, there’s not much difficulty either. If you have an oven, buy some egg tart shells, and you can make as many as you want.
However, egg tarts are indeed the most “lucrative” snack among these fast-food items. The tart shells cost just a few cents each, and even the slightly better ones don’t cost more than a dollar. Adding eggs and seasoning, the cost of a particularly good egg tart is no more than two dollars, but it can be sold for five, six, or even eight dollars each, yielding a profit margin of four to five times.
For this latest “Meow Meow Cat Paw Egg Tart,” adding a cute chocolate piece could likely increase the price by more than fifty percent.
If it weren’t for the fact that sweet snacks like this can become cloying after eating a few, I reckon many fast-food places would be able to cover their monthly rent just by selling egg tarts.
“Haha, it’s good that you’ve had experience. Once you’ve done it, it becomes convenient. Frying chicken, making ‘Beggar’s Chicken,’ and similar dishes are actually not difficult.”
Under my gaze, Chef Wang took two and a half portions of chicken from the nearby ingredient cabinet and introduced them to me one by one, “This is for fried chicken, this is for Orleans roasted chicken, and this one is for steamed chicken. The layer above is ‘Beggar’s Chicken,’ you can see all the labels on top.”
“Come on, little sister, put on gloves and a mask.”
Handing me some tools, Chef Wang, after watching me put them on, sprinkled some seasonings on the roast chicken in front of me, saying, “This is Orleans Roast Chicken. The key here is to evenly distribute the ingredients. It’s better to use more, so there are no areas left untouched. It’s that simple, right?”
After preparing the roast chicken, Chef Wang placed it in the nearby oven and handed me a plate, “Fried chicken is the same. I’ll go heat up the oil first. You do it like this… that’s right, just like that, coat it.”
“Nuo’er, if you learn to make this, it could increase our store’s sales by more than 30%.”
Ouyang Xue, sitting with her legs crossed behind me, sighed, “Really, I see you in this maid outfit with white stockings, clumsily making roast chicken, and I’m almost falling for you.”
What do you mean by clumsily!
I manipulated the chicken on the small table, daring to get angry but not saying anything.
This is just… I haven’t completely adapted to this little girl’s body, right? Back when I was still a middle-aged man, I could make a hundred of these fried chickens every day!
My clumsiness… what does it have to do with sales?
Under Ouyang Xue’s supervisory gaze, I cautiously asked, “If an employee is clumsy, wouldn’t customers generally… dislike them?”
“That’s just an ordinary employee, you’re different. Beautiful girls and cute girls have privileges. You are both beautiful and cute, and sometimes flaws can turn into advantages.”
Ouyang Xue explained, “Clumsiness in adults might not work, but for a little girl like you, being a bit silly can be very cute, and customers will just find it delightful.”
Alright… fine…
“Wait, just stay in that posture.”
She pulled out a delicate-looking camera from her bag and aimed the lens at me. “Don’t look at the camera. Continue what you were doing, like before.”
“Okay…”
I reluctantly continued to handle the chicken on the table. In no time, I seasoned it, coated it, quickly plated it, and headed towards the nearby oven.
Signature fried chicken, signature fried chicken… Let me see, this button.
I placed the fried chicken inside and pressed the switch for the “Signature Fried Chicken” button. I returned to the table from before.
“Nuo’er!”
Ouyang Xue, holding the camera, shouted, “Add two small chicken legs, two chicken wings, and an order of Peppercorn chicken!”
“Huh?!”
Almost reflexively, I said, “I… I think I can’t finish that much.”
Ouyang Xue immediately responded, “I’ll eat it.”
“Yes!”
I quickly ran to the nearby food cabinet and opened it. Small chicken legs, chicken wings, and the chicken for Peppercorn chicken… got it. The Peppercorn chicken here, like the fried chicken and oven-roasted chicken, is also pre-cut into semi-finished products, sparing me the embarrassment of having to cut a large piece of chicken into small chunks.
“Do I follow the same method as before?”
Bringing the ingredients to the table, I remembered the various options on the machine when I put the fried chicken in earlier: “Signature fried chicken, or the… peppercorn fried chicken or spicy fried chicken?”
“Not bad, you’re asking in advance. Very good.”
Ouyang Xue looked very satisfied. “Peppercorn, please.”
“Okay!”
I quickly grabbed the small bag labeled with peppercorn seasoning from the other side of the table. After another busy session, I successfully placed the prepared chicken legs, chicken wings, and popcorn chicken into the specialized fried chicken machine.
“Not bad.”
Ouyang Xue put away the camera. “I thought you might be fumbling around or tripping over something on the floor.”
Have I become that clumsy in your eyes?!
“I won’t trip!”
I instinctively gave the manager a glare, “I already said I have experience as a waitress!”
“Hahaha…”
The chef, Master Wang, also chuckled, “The little girl is indeed quite clever. The way she handles things doesn’t look like that of a novice. Sister Ouyang, don’t make fun of her.”
“I’m not making fun.”
Ouyang Xue explained, “If she had really clumsily fallen just now, I would have posted the video on any platform. With at least a hundred thousand views, that’s all traffic, which can directly translate into income.”
“Really?”
Master Wang looked like an honest man, saying, “I don’t understand these things anyway, haha.”
Are you really planning to capture me falling on camera…
These words from Ouyang Xue left me in despair. I was wrong, initially, I thought this big sister was a good person. She didn’t even frown while offering a monthly salary of six thousand yuan for such a good job. But as it turns out… she’s constantly thinking about how to squeeze the value out of me as an employee.
“Ding dong!”
While waiting for the fried chicken to be ready, the sensor at the living room’s main door emitted a sound indicating someone passing by — “Welcome!”
Following that were the hushed whispers of two guys, “There should be drinks here, right?”
“This café is so big, there must be some. I told you to bring more water, didn’t I? In such a remote place, there isn’t even a convenience store.”
“How is that my fault…”
“We have guests.”
Ouyang Xue reacted the fastest. She instantly jumped off the table, opened her shoulder bag, took out a board, a pen, and what seemed to be specially made handwritten paper. She pressed a piece of copy paper in the middle, then pulled out a menu.
“Quick, it’s your first time serving as a maid. You understand, right? Say ‘welcome,’ give them the menu, ask what they want. Write down whatever they say. Tear off the original for them, bring the handwritten copy to the chef.”
Shoving everything into my hands, Ouyang Xue pushed me towards the kitchen door. “Take off the gloves and mask, use your usual tone and manner of speaking. Go.”
“Okay.”
I didn’t linger, carrying the pen and paper, I trotted to the customer.
“Welcome!”
Honestly, wearing this maid outfit and white knee-high socks felt distinctly different from ordinary women’s clothing. The set I bought yesterday had a little skirt but lacked matching knee-high socks or stockings. Both hands didn’t have these kinds of decorative sleeves, and although the shoes appeared to be round-toed casual shoes, they weren’t much different from ordinary men’s shoes when worn.
But this maid outfit is different. Because it’s in the style of a one-piece dress, both the top and the little skirt are light and airy. Combined with the sleeves on the arms, it truly maximizes the experience of “crossdressing.” With the thigh-high stockings under the skirt, from my small feet to halfway up my thighs, everything is wrapped up. When moving, the legs feel distinctly different from usual, as the skin of the legs continuously rubs against the soft white stockings, as if constantly reminding myself, “You are already a cute girl, wearing enticing over-the-knee stockings, that’s something only girls wear!
Finally, the round-toed maid shoes under my feet, although not structured with a heel, have a sole. This sole is similar to the sole of JK Loli uniforms’ shoes. Almost all men’s shoes are designed for comfort, like casual shoes, basketball shoes, etc., with soft soles. In contrast, maid shoes have a certain hardness, making a “da da da da” sound when stepping on the wooden floor of the cafe.
This sound, like the clicking of women’s high heels, also belongs to the type that fills the air with a “feminine vibe.”
“At the moment, the store is in a semi-open state, and some dishes may not be fully available yet. The cats haven’t arrived either.”
Entering from the door were two college-aged guys with travel bags.
These two seemed to be around twenty-five or twenty-six years old. One of them wore a duckbill cap, giving off the vibe of those “world-traveling buddies” who ride bicycles or motorcycles.
“Come, sit here. You can get a good view of the Shenzhen River across from here.”
Amid the two men’s surprised gazes, I gestured for them to sit at a window-side table. I then picked up the tea pot from the table, poured two cups, and placed them in front of the two men. Afterward, I handed the menu to the slightly older-looking guy on the left, saying, “Take a look and see what you’d like to eat.”
“Uh…”
The guy on the right still hadn’t fully recovered from the shock of my appearance and physique. He curiously asked, “Does your boss hire child labor?”
“No, Nuo’er is not a child laborer,”
I replied with a stern face. “I’m an adult.”
“Oh, sorry.”
The guy quickly apologized, “It’s just that I thought you… were too cute. It’s my first time at a maid cafe.”
“Do you have cola here?”
The other guy, who had already looked through the menu, raised his head, asking, “And also… do you have milk tea?”
“We don’t have milk tea or coffee for now, but we do have cola, Sprite, and these…”
I pointed to the drinks on the right side of the menu with my pen. “These are all available, along with fried chicken, oven-roasted chicken. Fast-food items are not included.”
“Well, well, I originally thought it was a café, but there’s no coffee. However, there are so many options for fried chicken and egg tarts.”
The guy in front of me seemed quite happy. “Perfect, we haven’t had breakfast yet. How many maids do you have here in total?”
I replied sheepishly, “Just me.”
At that moment, I noticed Ouyang Xue from the kitchen walking towards us.
“Wow! They even offer maid photo sessions, only one yuan each time?!”
The guy with the menu had just flipped it over and noticed the “Take a photo with the maid for 1 yuan, and a photo with the cat for free” promotion. “Can we take a photo with you? You’re so cute, little sister.”
I nodded, “Sure, but aren’t you going to order first?”
“Okay, we’ll have this… What’s it called? Medicinal Steamed Chicken? What’s that?”
I explained earnestly, “It’s steamed chicken with some medicinal herbs and health-enhancing ingredients, giving the chicken a herbal aroma.”
“Alright, we’ll have that… and another box of this…”
The guy pointed to the “Meow Meow Cat Paw Egg Tart” on the menu.
Ouyang Xue happened to reach my side, asking, “What kind of egg tart is this?”
The guy felt a bit embarrassed, “Just this egg tart.”
Ouyang Xue put her hands on her hips, “This one, if you say it in the ‘Meow Meow’ style, can get an 20% discount, you know?”
“Meow Meow…”
Hearing about the discount, the guy hesitated for a moment, then blushed, “Meow Meow Cat Paw Egg Tart, I’ll take one.”
“Alright, Nuo’er, give them a 20% discount.”
I quickly wrote down the names of the dishes they ordered on the paper.
“Is that all?”
“That’s all, and a photo with the maid!”
“Thank you. Please scan the payment code here.”
I gestured towards the payment code on the table, tore off the written order, and placed it on the table. “Please wait.”
On the way to the kitchen, I vaguely heard the two guys behind me saying things like, “She’s really cute!” “Yeah, and her voice is so soft, too. Those ‘Meow Meow’ words are so adorable.”
“Manager.”
I handed the duplicated paper with the notes written on it to Chef Wang in the kitchen. Curiously, I asked Ouyang Xue, who had followed me, “Will making them say things like ‘Meow Meow Cat Paw’ give customers a bad impression?”
“It will.”
Ouyang Xue nodded. “It might make them uncomfortable for a short time.”
“But then why…”
“Traffic on the internet, whether positive or negative, is still traffic. If it’s traffic, there’s a way to monetize it.”
Seemingly aware of my curiosity, Ouyang Xue explained, “It’s the same in reality. Remember those old ads? ‘Brain Platinum, Brain Platinum,’ repetitive ads with little nutritional value, just continuously brainwashing you. Even when you’re fed up with it, they keep washing your brain. Yet, their advertising effect is excellent, whether it’s positive or negative.”
“Similar to what we did just now, forcing them to say the product name. While it might make customers uncomfortable in the short term, compared to regular restaurants, it’s easier for them to remember us. In the future, every time they see an egg tart or eat chicken, they’ll recall the experience of ordering ‘Meow Meow Cat Paw’ today. They’ll think of our store, think of you as the cute maid, and the more they think, the stronger their desire to come back and consume again.”
Ouyang Xue, with a strong and assertive demeanor, said, “In the future, you can also use this kind of psychology a bit, create more activities. As long as you make others remember you, remember our store, that’s success.”
“Sister Ouyang…”
The words from this short-haired and composed adult woman instantly made me “respectfully impressed.” “Did you used to work in marketing or advertising?”
“No.”
Ouyang Xue shrugged, sighed lightly, and said, “I used to be a Vtuber.”
……