Pioneering the Apocalyptic World - Chapter 13
Chapter 07: Make it, break it, make it again
Uru’s mood has improved, but it doesn’t seem to have completely recovered.
While I was expanding the room and making a bed, and while I was rebuilding the broken tools, Uru just stared at me without saying anything.
But she couldn’t suppress the itch to help me in anything, and I didn’t miss that.
“Would you like to make something?”
“… No, I… Just destroy things…”
She is really honest, even though she is stuttering, to don’t try to deny it. It made me smile a little.
“It’s okay, even if you break it. I will fix it properly. Well, if you break it on purpose, I will get angry, ok?”
“I will not break it on purpose. But… it’s just more work for Rion…”
In order to push Uru’s back, who couldn’t make the decision, I dared to say what I always thought, something that would make the Creator God very angry if she heard it.
“Destruction is the first step to creation”
“… What?”
I don’t know about the creator god. But this is true for me.
Because I can’t make anything without a material.
Destroy, obtain materials, and create.
Using what I have created, I destroy another thing, and use it to create another thing. It’s just the repeat of this.
No matter what you do, destruction will follow. However, there is a future to it.
During the month since I came to Asteria, I had a thought.
‘What is the difference between a monster trying to kill me and me trying to kill a monster?’
Monsters probably, live according to the instinct of “killing living things”.
I for the reason of “to protect myself” killed monsters, but even if that is not the case, there are times when I kill “for the sake of the material”.
Well, monsters go to kill other creatures if left alone, so killing them when you see them is still the “right thing to do”.
The reason why I was troubled by this thought was probably because I learned that “even monsters have blood”.
Because I realized that they are not just a piece of game data, but a ‘living thing’ in this world.
Things that merely destroy things and return to nothing, and those that turn to creation after destruction.
If you’re alive, it’s natural to continue to live.
To just seek destruction is not ‘right’.
During my gaming days, I had the principle of getting along with other races, including lizards, that were treated as a monsters.
It was because a vague idea of “Because I can talk with them”‘, but now I would answer “Because they are not a race that just destroy things”.
Because that.
“Uru. Even if all you can do is destroy, I will create from what you destroyed and connect it to the future.
That’s why, I want you to not be afraid to create(destroy). If you can question the act of destroying something, then I don’t think that it is bad thing after all.”
“–”
After saying that, I became a little embarrassed. So i scratch my head as to hide my embarrassment.
“… Ahaha, if I affirm destruction, with just a litle mistake, I’m will be not a creator god miko, but a miko of the god of destruction.”
No matter how much a old thing is reborn into the next thing, from the side of being to be destroyed, I may not be any different from the God of Destruction.
I’ve already decided to put it aside that thought. Well, sometimes i think “Is this really okay?.
In the end, I guess I’m just an egoist and a manufacturing junkie at heart.
I feel that i can understand why the creator god called me…I also feel that there must have been people who made more things than me…so I don’t know.
Let’s ask next time we meet.
Uru, who had been silently listening to me for a long time as I looked back and mocked myself, opened her mouth.
“… No, you are a true miko of the Creator God…. At least, I think so.”
“Really? Thank you. But if you ever talk to the God of Creation, please keep this talk a secret.”
When I laughed with my finger in front of my mouth like a joke, Uru finally loosened her cheek.
That is good. I don’t like to having a cute girl keep making a stern face.
…And i forgot something important.
“Ah… it’s right after I was being pretentious, but just remember this.”
“Huh? What is it?”
Seeing me with a strange attitude, Uru braces herself again.
However, what I’m about to say is very natural thing.
“Even for me… even if I am a miko of the Creator God, I can’t do anything about a lost life.”
There is a regeneration potion that gradually restores LP. There is a scapedoll that will break instead of you when you receive a lethal blow.
However, a resuscitation medicine does not exist.
Players were supposed to respawn when they died, but residents didn’t.
In the game era, there was a event of saving a village from monster attacks– a Defensive battle, I still remember the memories of when the defense failed. After letting all the villagers die, they turned into zombies and I was attacked.
And then… the village became an abandoned village and the fire of life was never lit again.
“I can make 1 into 10, but I can’t make 0 into 1”
“… Ok, let’s keep it in mind”
In the end, Uru that day didn’t say “I want to make something”.
Well, I’m not going to force her, so please take your time and think about it.
After eating dinner and checking if the holy water was properly sprinkled, I dropped my consciousness in the darkness of the night
…but I was soon pulled back.
A chilling sensation ran through my body.
I did check the holy water properly, so why!?? I tried to stand up, but I couldn’t get up and started to panic, but then I realized the reason why I couldn’t get up, and become exhausted and dropped down.
“Uru, wait a minute. Are you half asleep?”
Uru, who was supposed to be sleeping in the next room in her bed, had crawled into my futon. I made it, so I want you to use it!
I tried to tear off Uru who was clinging to my arm, but she wouldn’t move.
“…d”
“Hmm? What?”
because she was muttering something I put my ear closer.
“It’s cold… my body is heavy…”
“Eh, hey”
It’s true, She is shivering…it is a cold? “cold medicine…” I thought, but there’s no such thing!
She was fine until a while ago, but after all, she was still recovering and shouldn’t have moved that much, what should I do… After thinking about it, I remembered that I was a miko.
I could at least try to make something… but she wouldn’t let me go.
“Uru, I’m sorry, but let me go a little–”
“……Fine……”
“What?”
“It’s fine… if I’m by your side, somehow… make me feel calm–…”
While saying such a thing intermittently, Uru’s reaction disappeared.
Has it gotten worse and she lost consciousness? I become impatient, but as her rough breathing gradually calmed down, and i exhaled for a long time to calm myself.
It seems that the word calm was not a psychological thing but a physical thing. No, well, they say that the illness comes from the mind, but… let’s put that aside.
“Hmm… let’s wait and see…”
I can’t let my guard down when it’s not clear if it’s just the cold weather or if there’s some other cause.
I increased the number of comforters and decided to stay with her in a state where it was a bit too hot for me.
The next morning, when she woke up with a cheerful face, I felt both relieved for her wellbeing and resentment for not getting enough sleep.