The Lying Counselor’s Eloquent Reasoning - Chapter 24
“Well, here’s the question, Tomomi. Which of these four is my least favorite?”
Here, on the other hand, was the same old Takahiko Uroma Counseling Room. As always, a man in a white coat was asking questions to the high school girl in front of him. The man was sitting in a chair at the sole office desk in the room, and on the desk were four different containers of tablets. From left to right, they were pink, green, blue, and silver. Each of them was the same brand, and each color was supposed to have a slightly different taste.
“Dr. Uroma, what is the meaning of this question??”
“Haha. I haven’t approved your right to return my question with a question yet, have I, Tomomi? Please answer my question quickly.”
“I mean, there’s only one choice, isn’t there?”
Tomomi said, staring at the leftmost pink one on the desk. She hadn’t witnessed Uroma eating any of this particular color since her first day here. Uroma typically consumed the silver or blue ones for this brand.
“Well, it’s obvious that your least favorite is this one??”
She was about to point to the pink one, but then Tomomi realized. How could the man in front of her ask her a question that was so predictable?
To begin with, his question was about which ones he didn’t like. According to the conventional approach, it would be the pink one, which he eats the least often, but in this man’s case, it was highly improbable that such common sense would apply. In fact, he may have deliberately refrained from eating it because he favored it. So, is it possible that he only eats it on special occasions, as a reward for his hard work?
If that’s the case… then this should be the other way around.
“This is it, I suppose. This silver one is probably the one you don’t like the most.”
“Really? Why is that? I’m certain I eat this one the most out of all of them.”
“W-Well? Like, you’re not good at it, so you dare to eat a lot of it?”
“Haha, I’m not like a Hindu monk, you know? I eat a lot of it because it’s my favorite food.”
“Eh, then what’s the answer?”
“Of course, it’s this one.”
Uroma pointed to the pink one.
“This one has a certain sweetness to it. I don’t like it. I never enjoy it because it’s overly sweet.”
“H-Ha…”
I wonder why he is so straightforward only at times like this.
“I figured, since it was you, it must be some kind of trap.”
“Haha, you’re overestimating my cynicism, aren’t you? What do I have to gain by setting such a trap for you?”
“No, I don’t know what the meaning of this question is, before I even consider gain or loss??”
“In the beginning, please reflect on it. My question was, which of these do you like the least? Under regular circumstances, I would have asked you which one is my favorite, but you deliberately think the other way around. At that point, I had already expended all the cynical skills I had left in me. Once you’ve reached that point, you’ll naturally know that the rest of the answer is straightforward.”
“C-Cynical skills…”
What’s that? I mean, you said you expended all the cynical skills, but isn’t that a lie? Isn’t this guy the type who has an inexhaustible supply of skills like that?
“So, I’ll give this unfortunate prize to you for answering my question incorrectly.” Uroma then took the pink tablet and handed it to Tomomi.
“You can have it for your three o’clock snack.”
“Snack?”
Tomomi was amazed at his words. Come to think of it, I think one of the conditions, when I was hired as an assistant here, was that I would be provided with a snack. Could this be it? Or, perhaps, was the current exchange meant to fulfill that meager benefit? Why go through all that trouble when you can just hand it over normally… Tomomi was astonished. This man was deadly annoying.
“There’s an old saying, isn’t there? If you’re foolish, you won’t do any good if you have too much time on your hands. I think I learned it in school.”
“Is that the saying, ‘A small man can do no good by staying idle?’.”
“Ah, yes. That’s the phrase.”
Those words, Tomomi thought, were fitting for Uroma right now.
“I get it. In other words, you are trying to say that this is who I am now… ahaha?”
Uroma hung up one end of his mouth and laughed in a way that suggested he was being mocked.
“As a counselor, I certainly have a lot of free time on my hands. This revelation was swiftly discovered by you, who had only been working here for a short time. It is truly shameful. I feel very sorry for myself. Having said that, trying to apply those words to the current me is utterly misguided. This is not a matter of whether I am more of a dwarf or a prince. Simply, you are using the word in the wrong way. That’s right, the phrase does not originally have the meaning that you just mentioned.”
“Eh…”
“In this phrase, the word ‘idle’ does not originally mean having too much time on your hands. It means when you are alone and have no eyes on you. In other words, the exact interpretation of this phrase is that foolish people do foolish things when they are out of sight of others.”
“N-No way!”
“I am not lying. It’s the truth. To put it another way, the essential point of this phrase is whether or not there is public eye, so considering that I am now confronting another person, Tomomi, I cannot do anything unrighteous regardless of whether I am a dwarf or a prince. Hence, the original meaning of the phrase proves that I am virtuous! What do you think of the weight of my words, having become an overwhelmingly good existence with the eyes of another person, Tomomi?”
“N-No, that…”
Tomomi didn’t know what was happening anymore, but Uroma was so proud of his victory that it made her feel humiliated.
“Well, we all make mistakes with our words. I, as a good person, don’t generally get upset about such things. Even if you make a mistake, I’ll gently brush it off. Regardless of how fatal the error may be to your life, I will not correct it. However, I will not do so with words of criticism or denunciation. Even I, the incarnation of goodness, can’t help but reflexively retort. Do you have any idea how I feel?”
“Y-Yeah, well….”
“I mean, you have to be more careful in choosing the words you use to criticize others. If you mess up, you will be countered painfully. Like what just happened to you.”
Uroma smirked again; it was a nasty smile. Tomomi became even more annoyed. She can’t help but wonder how unpopular this man is, that he would go to such great lengths to refute a small sarcastic remark made by someone.
At that moment, a woman entered the counseling room with a voice saying, “Hello. Please excuse me”. She was in her mid-fifties, thin, wearing an elegant beige two-piece, with long, light brown hair.
“Am I right in assuming that this is a place where I can seek counseling?”
The woman immediately noticed Uroma’s presence and asked him about it. She seemed to be a woman of leisure with a comfortable life, so Tomomi did not feel that she had any particular need for counseling.